I've blown a few things in my day
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Ketchup is God's man juice
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
