oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you will always have a special place in my vag
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
