hell yes lets make some ravioli
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i used baking grease as lip gloss
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
