So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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