I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
