well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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