Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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