I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Only a mothe r could love this liver
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
drinking out of a sandbucket again
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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