I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize