Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
