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• (214): View more from Texas

  I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson

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• (818): View more from California

  I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.

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• (650): View more from California

  Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy

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• 

  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Some girl just showed me her stretch marks

  (757): View more from Virginia

  You need to get out of tn

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• (587): View more from Alberta

  I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?

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• (260): View more from Indiana

  And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.

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• 

  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.

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• (619): View more from California

  Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day

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• (813): View more from Florida

  Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.

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