You made me cry and you don't even care
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize