Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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