Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I was not drunk enough for that final.