I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
