Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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