Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Randomize