WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize