Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
