I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
