how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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