Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
My ATM looks so different sober.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize