Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize
