Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
