I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
