with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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