so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
