I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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