At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
