ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Yo dont text me then not text me
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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