After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize