No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
