OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Randomize
