Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I've blown a few things in my day
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
she peed on how many people?
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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