He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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