she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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