At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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