we have officially lost it.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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