is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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