I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
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