I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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