'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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