i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
