I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
