Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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