But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
