Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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