I must be too annoying 4 u.
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
