Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
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Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
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Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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