um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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